Thursday, May 20, 2010

This Ain’t The Autobahn

I’ve heard all my life phrases like “it’s the journey that counts and not the destination.” I’ve listened, and I thought I got it. But I think as I get older it’s one of those things that I keep understanding more.

I’ve often spent time looking forward to when certain goals are achieved. Buying a house. Having a kid. Hitting a certain salary. Being a certain weight. The thing is, none of these goals are end points. What’s the point of rushing through things just to get there? There’s never a place to stop, sit down and say – I’m done! I did it and now I can relax and do nothing. Also, I really suck at doing nothing. It’s too boring.

Thinking about that, I realize that I need to generally just slow the heck down. Life is busy and all, but I’m the one who’s been setting the pace. And while I have great friends, a great husband, an awesome kid…all these things take a level of work and attention. And it should be relaxed, thoughtful attention. Even the house stuff (like the infamous junk drawers) – why not try to actually enjoy the process of those things, of creating order from the chaos. (OK, I’m not sure how to enjoy the process of laundry yet, but let me know if you have ideas.) And definitely not last on the list, I also deserve time and attention. Things are busy, but spending time on me, whether that means exercising, taking a bath, writing – it’s all necessary to the care and feeding of myself. And as much as I beat myself up, I am worth it. ;-)

My garden is doing really, really well this year (and given my lack of a green thumb in the past, I secretly think my gardening grandmother who passed away last year is behind it!). Like all that other stuff, it’s not about the end, the harvest. It’s about the care and feeding of the plants, the cultivation and the process of tending to the garden. The harvest is the reward of all that work, but it’s not nearly the whole story.

So it’s time to put on the brakes and stop being so focused on getting somewhere. Time to enjoy where I am and move forward at a slower, more thoughtful pace. It’s probably wise to do so before I spin out and crash into a side rail.

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