We are funny creatures. We have the blueprints for so many things that we want. Want to lose weight? You know what to eat and what not to eat. Want to have muscles? You know how to exercise. Want a promotion? You know what you need to do. And yet - we don't do it. Or at least, I don't. Or I do for a period of time and then I totally slack off. Followed by a bitch session about why I'm not seeing whatever result I'm looking for.
WHY do we do this? I can't figure it out, honestly. I can't figure out if its laziness, self-sabotage, or if I just get tired and find comfort in things that don't mesh with the goal. Sometimes I'm cool with it - I tell myself life is short and that glass of wine and rich dinner is totally worth it. As are the 3 glasses of wine after. ;-) And then the breakfast tacos are necessary to recover from the wine. Well, you get my drift.
Anyway, then there are days when I straighten up, eat perfectly, do all the stuff I'm supposed to, and generally just kick ass. And that feels good. Its just hard to keep up all the time, I guess. But do I have to?
At the risk of sounding resigned, I really have no reason other than vanity to want to look like a supermodel in a bikini. I don't need to attract guys (I got one!), I'm happy, and I get to eat, which I think many supermodels can't do. ;-) In terms of exercise, I'm pretty fit, and get probably more exercise than the average American. Career-wise, I'm doing pretty good. I want success, but I don't want my career to be my whole life, and there are limits to what I'll sacrifice for it. I guess what I'm saying is that things are good. So I can probably stop beating myself up for not perfectly following the blueprints I have.
We hold ourselves to some crazy standards. I think, perhaps, its time that I reset mine a bit and aim mainly for just a smile, a good quality of life, and warm moments with friends and family. Really, there's not a whole lot more to need.
Except for maybe a pony.