Thursday, June 3, 2010

Lucky 7

So I think there is often a misconception that there are these amazing marriages that work without fights, problems, issues, whatever. After 10 years with the same person, I know this is not true. It is WORK. We fight. We have gone several days not speaking. All that said, I wouldn't trade my marriage for anything. And it’s great when you read articles or books or whatever about marriage that are real, honest and something we can all relate to. Marriage is work, but its GOOD work, and for me has been totally worth the effort. It’s made me a better person, and its challenged me in ways I never expected.

This article is perhaps one of the best I’ve read about marriage. The author is a writer who basically put her own marriage under the microscope, resulting in some massive revelations and harsh moments as well. There were a lot of “me too!” moments in reading it. Studying and analyzing your marriage is, I think, really valuable. However, I think there is sometimes something to be said for rose colored glasses. Knowledge is power, but it’s also hard to realize how many imperfections something might have until you really begin to dig into it. As she puts it in the article, when you shake the bush some snakes might come slithering out. Indeed.

Despite the issues and tough moments, I appreciate my marriage for the patience it teaches me, for the person it’s made me grow into, for the challenges its presented, and for the effort it has required and rewarded. We just celebrated our 7 year wedding anniversary, and the journey continues to astound. I’m sure the work will never end, but it’s worth it.

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for this post and the article. Marriage is so different than I originally imagined, way more challenging than I thought but equally more rewarding than I knew. Marriage really makes you step up to growth and that reality is not often depicted in our societal myths about marriage. Sometimes I wonder if the divorce rate is so high in this country because we have forgotten to talk about marriage as work. Great post!