I’ve been thinking a lot about God and spirituality lately. God and I have had a complex relationship. And religion and I have gone toe to toe more than once. I’ve typically dealt with any questions around my beliefs with the phrase “I’m not religious, but I’m spiritual.” I think I believed it. But I didn’t really ever have anyone hold me to task on it, and I never had to actually really define what that means to me. And I’m realizing that all these years, I’ve pretty much used that phrase as a copout and just put myself at the head of my world.
I’m kind of rethinking that. I still am not comfortable with the word “God.” It makes me squirmy. So far, I’ve gotten to the point where I do believe in a higher power – something more than me. I don’t know what that is or what that looks like at all. Which is ok.
I’ve had some things making me think about this a lot lately. And I’ve decided that for me, the image of a higher power is a tree. Its bigger than me, and its connected to the Earth. I could go on about the aspects of a tree that align to my thinking about a higher power. Not to mention that trees just make me happy.
No worries – I don’t plan to get all weird and preachy with spirituality and higher powers. But I do think there is a benefit and a place for those thoughts. And I do like the process of making myself think about it and being honest about what I really believe – and don’t believe. For the moment, me and my tree will just be pondering things.